Time will trundle… so it does and yet that’s the only constant. My little girl, you will grow into a woman some day.
I am addressing this letter to the years you are yet to tread through, to the time when you will stand and watch your childhood swiftly slipping away, to every moment that will add a lasting colour or fade away the tinge of unbridled joy of nonage, to every loss and win that will carve the shapes of your thoughts, to the ups and downs that will decide the bends of your beliefs and to the drops of rain, to the smell of earth wafting from the ground and to every sight and sound that will shape the woman you will grow to be.
This is to your big self, my fragile limbed and big eyed- 6 year old!, yes you — who is now called princess and doll, who walks in her frilled frocks with her teddy clutched in her fist.
Let me tell you that the world is not a fair place and life is not a fairy tale… princess and doll are hollow names. You have stepped out believing that the world is just a reflection of your own inner beauty and fragility. It is and it is not.
You have grown up seeing me. I am not such a good example. I am a bundle of my own mistakes and consequence of my own decisions. There is no all-proof way of living a life. There is no rule book. Every woman’s story is unique and so will be yours.
Know that there is no substitute to honesty. It pays. It causes pain and discomfort for a short while but it steers things in right direction. Mistakes are important to one’s growth and understanding. If you fall and feel defeated don’t let it reduce you or your spirit. You may even feel cheated at times. Use every adversity to your benefit and wear your scars with pride. Let your successes make you humble and never linger on your laurels for too long.
Remember that there are two days in your life: one in your favor and one against you**. Face them with dignity and grace. (**Reference from Nehjul Balagah)
Trust is a rare gift so choose wisely the people around you. Forgiveness unburdens the heart and does more good to the one who forgives but never forget what hurt you. Don’t dwell in confusions. If you don’t find answers for anything or when things stop making sense , take a step back and wait for destiny to give you hints to choose. There are signs, read them well and trust your intuitions, that’s God’s voice.
Equality is your right and not somebody’s favor. Earn everything. Fear may hold you back sometimes but remember that fear has no body, it has no voice. The pounding in your heart is not audible to others lest you leave it loose, so snuff it right there and rise with courage and self belief. Confidence is a woman’s best friend.
Discover your gift … where your superpower and magic lies…In flair for words or stroke of brush or the power of thoughts or the strength of voice or the art hidden in pores of fingers or wonders of inquisitive mind. Find out that gift and nourish it well for bringing positive changes in your life and the lives around you. Find meaning and value in your life.
Happiness is in giving. Feed the stray cat or put grains and water for thirsty sparrows. These small acts of kindness and giving have abundance of happiness. Dependency and expectations are roots of setbacks and unhappiness. Don’t hold onto something that does not belong to you. Don’t attach your happiness to things like a house or a car or a relationship. Such things come with a full stop and a following emptiness.
Being a woman is a wonderful gift in itself. You are complete in yourself. Always look ahead but keep on using your side and rear view mirrors.
My dear daughter Shifa, Happy Women’s Day to the woman you will grow to be!